Beginning a run of players who have been invited over to England in the last two days and end up signing thinking it is always this warm.
He'll be wearing tights and two pairs of gloves before September's out.
Crumbs, we've seen some pretty desperate transfer story links in our time (and many perpetrated by this column) but to suggest that Cristiano Ronaldo is going to Atletico Madrid on the back of the manager's son liking a tweet is really scraping the barrel.
That's not to say Ronaldo won't end up at Atleti but we'll only believe it when we see a long-lens shot of him drying himself off with a red and white striped beach towel.
But nobody wants to be in the front row.
Well I suppose Zack Steffen is better than nothing. Just.
Middlesbrough, Birmingham City, Norwich City and Swansea City were interested in Mooy but he's opted for Celtic. Mooy was previously in China with Shanghai Port.
From Morecambe to Miami? It's a natural progression, surely (so he will probably end up back in New York with New York City FC)?